Betty: X tries really hard to be perfect, and then she’s brutal when she finds that she’s not. But she doesn’t always find that she’s not. She finds that somebody else is not. Can you pray, “Lord, in you mercy, would you bring healing to those of us in my own family who suffer from these demands on themselves and therefore, unconsciously, are demanding of others. Heal anyone that we have hurt unwittingly in our anger at ourselves for being so imperfect, and uncompassionate. 

I’m seeing like a whole bunch of adjectives smacking up. What is it that you hate about yourself? Could you throw all those adjectives over to the cross? Ask the Lord to help you. Stand in the reality of the moment where you are, so you don’t have to beat people up when you find the disappointment of where you are not. What just came to me is Y. I wonder if in the next life, he’s saying, “I wish I had been more gentle and understanding. I realize that I was infuriated at myself.” I think Y suffers a lot from what you’re suffering from. So, pray for him. What I’m picking up is he’s feeling the pain of how he pushed others away from him. When really, it was the annoyance of seeing a similar imperfection in that person that he couldn’t stand in himself. And so, he overreacted and took it out on the person. I guess in the next life, we probably do see things like this and think, “Oh, my gosh!” I don’t think half of us realize some of the dumb things we do until we’re faced with grace. And that’s what the next life is. We’re faced with the grace and we’re saying, “Oh, wow, Sorry! Forgive me. Did I step on your toe? I was not aware of it. I was so busy being perfect, I didn’t realize I was jumping up and down on your toe in my anger and my rage at my imperfection.” Which I think we do. The image I’m seeing right now is of this person raging and angry at their imperfection. But it’s, “Lady, could you please get off my toe? Your anger is happening. I understand that part. But why do you have to jump on my toe to realize it.” It’s a crazy image. But it put me in contact with what we do.