Betty: Think about this. The more we move toward loss of control, the more that part of us that needs to control will act up. We’re being controlled. People’s anger is going to grow even though they might not figure this whole thing out.
Now, let’s take what we learned from what Jesus told Luisa. Jesus said there aren’t any accidents. He said, “If things happen, it’s because my will is permitting it.” So, go back to you. God’s will is permitting that you have to learn how to remain at peace even though injustice is being done to you. It’s not as easy as it sounds. So, we have a good reason to feel that we’re out of control, because we are.
You’re losing freedoms. When you become aware of these things, we actually need not just stop at awareness, but bring it into prayer. Otherwise, we can become resentful. Awareness can just lead to greater resentment. That’s no healing. The fact is we need to get in touch with the injustice and what’s going on right now, Now, the good side of it is that in order to really draw closer to Jesus, you’ve got to will to lose your control, to give it to Jesus. But that’s different from what’s happening to you right now. Jesus doesn’t force you. Those of this world do.
AM: I’m getting my buttons pushed. X is pushing back and is a little more angry.
Betty: X doesn’t like anxiety. Jesus is telling you not to be anxious. So, it’s not just X. Maybe that’s what you need to work on. What helped me was I asked the Lord to help me know when I was starting to get anxious. That’s when he helped me be aware that when my breath got shorter, often I was unconsciously, saying yes to anxiety. So, if you truly want to obey what Jesus is asking of you, ask Him to help you to become aware when your breath gets shorter. What I learned to do was when I was aware, I would take a deep breath and hold it and tell myself, “Betty, trust Jesus.” And then I would image crud from inside of me going to the cross. Whatever I was thinking and worrying about, I would ask Jesus to take care of whatever it was. So, it is a practical help to break a bad habit.
I remember sitting in the car in Philadelphia, and I had to give a talk. It was a Friday night and I just realized the traffic could make me late. I started to get anxious. That’s when I heard very clearly, “It displeases me when you don’t trust me.” In other words, if you and I choose to be anxious, we’re really saying we can’t trust Jesus. We can’t call on Jesus to help us. He is not going to be there for us. He is not going to do the job. That’s an insult. So, I remember repenting and telling him I was sorry. He was right. I was anxious. But I was sorry that I hadn’t started earlier, because that was careless of me. I said, “Can you please help me get there? And I’ll never forget it. Mc Dade Boulevard is filled with lights that were often red during rush hour. I went out on Mc Dade Boulevard and Jesus kept the lights green all the way down to where I got on the expressway. I realized he was showing me that if I put my trust in Him, it actually goes better than wasting it with anxiety. And plus that, I hadn’t associated anxiety with insult. It is. It is saying, “You’re helpless. You can’t help me.” And I have the bad habit that you have. I was mad at myself, because I hadn’t left earlier which is no excuse.
AM: Well see, for me, it’s tied up a lot in the Perfectionist. I’m making mistake after mistake and I just get enraged. I’m trying to get better.
Betty: Who are you glorifying when you do that? It’s time to give it up. See, I think there’s a difference between you and I and that is that I’m more simplistic. I think that was God’s grace. It wasn’t just myself being simplistic But it’s like, I really believe God can make a difference. And when I repented, I accepted the faith to believe. First, you need to repent when you insult God. Second, you need to believe that he is almighty God, and if it’s truly for your good, he will make the difference. Apparently, that night he wanted to teach me, actually reward me, for putting in the trust. I think that’s why it helped those green lights, so that my car wasn’t stuck at every red light.