Betty: Did you do any work on what we talked about?

AM: Yeah, I prayed in tongues. I didn’t sleep last night. 

Betty: Was your brain whirling around?

AM: It wasn’t even that. I don’t know why. I don’t sleep very well these days. 

Betty: Usually it seems to appear when you’re in a place where you’re trying to save yourself. That’s why I always think it’s your controller, your Perfectionist. And if you’re trying to save yourself, then it says to me, you’re not in the part where you let go, put it in the hands of the Lord, and trust him. I find when I do that, he’ll continue to try to reach me. Because I’m not becoming my own pseudo savior. I’m actually trying to stand in truth and call out to Him in trust to help. I think there might be the difference. There’s a part of you that has the broken trust or something tries to take over and keeps demanding that you save yourself. I don’t know if that rings a bell with you. Then, you put heavy demands. That’s what makes me think it’s the Perfectionist saying, “God’s not doing it right. We’ve got to do it.” And I want to say to her, “Back off. I’m not putting my trust in you.” If I feel my trust with Jesus is broken, I say, ”Lord, please help me to get rid of whatever lie is telling me that you’re unfaithful.” Work at the real cause. If you’re going to sit there and eat popcorn, we’re not going to get much work done. Because you’re shoving down what you’re feeling with every kernel you put in your little mouth. I refuse to work with a non-worker.

If you’re struggling with falling asleep, check in to see if it’s your controller or Perfectionist. If you feel your trust with Jesus is broken, you can say, ”Lord, please help me to get rid of whatever lie is telling me that you’re unfaithful.” Work at the real cause.