AM: For me, I’ve been the scapegoat. I’m not in that role so much now, so maybe that’s why there’s tension when we get together. 

Betty: Oh yeah. That’s right. Inside she’s saying, “If you’d just get back in your place and carry whatever guilt she wants you to carry…” All of this is unconscious. She wouldn’t figure all this out. But anyhow, the way out is for you to admit your hook. So, why don’t you go into prayer, and admit how you lack courage to stand in the integrity of truth. Tell the Lord you’re sorry. You really want to face that part of you that lacked courage and bring it to the Lord for healing.

AM: “So Lord, I give you that part of me that lacks courage…”

Betty: If we speak truth and add our own judgment to it, then it doesn’t ring true, because we’re playing God. Basically, we really don’t know why another person does anything. Only God knows. So, we’ve got to hand over our need to appear wise and place a judgment on things, and submit it to the Lord. Go into tongues. Tell the Lord you want to get unhooked from any game play between you and X.

AM: We both have judgment on each other.

Betty: You’re both out of where you’re supposed to be as a creature. We’re not meant to judge one another. We’re meant to love the other. And by love, I mean, a Christian love which is to seek the true good of the other. 

AM:  There’s also…

Betty: Since you’re hooked into her stuff, why don’t you ask the Lord to help you get unhooked? You have the judgment on her, so you would be the first one to get unhooked.

AM:  “Lord, help me to not be so judgmental…” 

Betty: “Because judgmental people really hook me. They bring up my anger. I just want to isolate from them.” 

AM: Exactly. 

Betty: Okay, does that mean that you’re praying for your Perfectionist right now? I think you are. Look at those people and meet your shadow.